Floortime Recap

I'm warning all of you from the get-go that this post is for our reference, and may not be that interesting to the rest of you all.  We just finished up a month long course on the therapy we've been implementing with Luke. Michelle (our speech therapist) wanted us to first do the Floortime Approach.  Darren and I have really liked some of the concepts of this type of therapy and have definitely implemented parts of it into everyday life with Luke.  

Before I get to my notes, I really want to express my feelings about therapy up to this point.  

I've learned a lot.  I've learned a lot about myself.  I've learned a lot about Darren.  And I've learned a lot about my little Luke.  I've learned that I am a very involved mother.  I can't just let things slide, and that can come in my favor and also hurt me at times.  Darren and I have learned we have an amazing circle of support and most importantly an amazing son. I've learned that there are bright lights of joy in the mist of what may seem like a huge trial and burden.  I've learned to celebrate every little victory and not dwell as much on what isn't happening.  I've come to the realization that our purpose as Luke's parents is to help him become the best Luke he can be.  Even at the age of two, we can really only be there with all the love and support parents can offer and the rest is up to him.  I've learned who I can trust and who's comments I should take with a grain of salt.  I've learned that most people have an opinion on the best technique or reason why Luke is the way he is, but I KNOW without a doubt that I am his mother.  That I know this little boy BETTER than anyone else in the world.  And that through prayer and the Spirit, Darren and I are the ones that can help Luke the most.  I've learned not to judge other parents in hard situations and that our situation compared to others is minimal. 

Luke will learn how to talk :) It will just be on Luke's time.  

Finally, I've learned that I wouldn't trade Darren, Luke, and this little baby boy in my belly for ANYTHING in the world.   We are all meant to go on all these journeys and adventures together.   

What is Floortime?

"Floortime is a social/emotional, relationship based play therapy.  It is a warm and intimate way of relating to a child that means engaging, respecting, and getting in tune with the child in order to help the child elaborate through gestures, words, and pretend play what is on his mind."  

In my words: Floortime is getting on Luke's level and letting him take the lead with play.  You validate and tolerate their emotions and try to have continuous circles of communications with your child. The circles of communication don't necessarily have to be verbal circles, but that is the ultimate goal. 

Parents play a very active role in this therapy.

The Floor Time technique can really be used all the way through the teenage years.

The Floortime technique is basically opposite of behavioral type therapy.  Floortime is child led.  Behavioral is adult led. 

The 5 main steps in Floortime:

1. Observe

2. Action into an interaction: assist, imitate, or playful obstruction

3. Open a circle of communication

4. Expand & extend

5. Let the child close the circle

It is all about the process, and not the end product.  

They taught us to join in THEIR frustration.  Memories are created with emotions. Let them feel emotions.

Aubry (the instructor of the course) really challenged us to think about using toys in different ways. How else can you use a shape sorter? A puzzle? A train set?  These types of creative play really help open up the circle of communication with Luke.  

Discipline:

I used the example of Luke's obsession with elevators.  Yesterday when I took him to Discovery Gateway I decided we weren't going on the elevator at all.  Luke didn't like that.  He didn't like that at all.  I asked Aubry how you would discipline using floortime and here are the techniques:

"Go there with them." Emulate the intensity and feeling of their emotion.  Help them identify it.  Add language and reasoning. Then problem solve the situation with them: "I know you like the elevator BUT we came here to play with the balls and tree house."

If Luke is using behavioral intent with his negative behavior (he understands what he is doing wrong) use more of a behavioral approach.

If Luke is so disconnected and they really don't understand their behavior is negative (like the elevator example) use more of a FloorTime approach.

Always remember that learning to solve problems (as toddlers or adults) when feeling emotional is a hard skill to master.

Other tidbits:

Use animated words!

Repetition, repetition, repetition!

Play dumb and Wait.  SILENCE IS A GOOD THING.  

Be Luke's favorite toy (Darren for sure is this!!)

Although Floortime is child led, you still need to SET LIMITS.  And ALWAYS be consistent with those rules and limits.  Aubry used the story of getting a soda out of the machine. (sorry I don't want to expand on that for ya all.)

I've really learned how to take Luke's situation and turn it into an adult situation.  Think about how frustrated and scared you would be as an adult if you were stuck in a foreign country and were lost and hungry and only knew how to say the words ball, more, and mommy.  I would literally have an anxiety attack, so it is no wonder that Luke and other toddlers can have breakdowns when there is a lack of verbal communication.

Emotions trigger memories.

Emotions are not cognitive- it is a physical feeling.  Aubry used the example of teaching kids with flash cards showing a frown, smile, etc. isn't always accurate.

Once we can figure out our OWN emotions, we can relate to OTHERS' emotions.

How we've seen improvements with Luke thus far:

We've seen Luke more comfortable in expressing lots of emotions as we've encouraged him and "gone there with him" when he is feeling upset or excited.

His eye contact has improved ten fold.  

We've implemented the "if and then" approach and Luke seems to really grasp that.  

He love love LOVES floortime with Darren.  

He is learning how to be better with wait time.

His tantrums (which weren't that bad to begin with) are lessening.